That’s fine—if that’s what you think, you don’t actually get it. And if that’s you? Cool.
But before you go, take a hard look at where people in your life have asked you for something simple—respect, dignity, kindness. How many times have you said, “Nope, not something I can do,” or just refused to look at their request?
Someone asking for kindness isn’t an attack. It’s not selfish. It’s not a big deal. If you’re making it one? That’s a you thing.
And to that I say: Seee yaaa.
For those of you still here- the ones who know Unfiltered is exactly what you need- I want you to ask yourself:
How many of these people ^ are you still letting tread all over you?
How many times have you let their opinions, their disrespect, or their lack of kindness convince you that you deserve less?
Here’s the truth: You deserve. So. Much. More.
And it starts now.
And to be totally clear...
To be expressed, to be loved, to be light. It’s about holding yourself accountable, shedding the “I’m fine” mask, I can take one more thing, I've got this, when your body is screaming for rest, when your mind is begging you to stop, when you're tailspinning through uncertainty. And instead choosing you. and living a life that’s yours and no one else’s.
Living Unfiltered means asking yourself: What do I need right now... AND who cares what someone else thinks about it? That's living in alignment. That’s freedom. And that’s what I want to share with you.
The Gift.
I stepped away from the noise- my business, my relationships, my own internal chaos- and started asking myself one question, every single morning, anytime things felt too much, or when I felt myself saying yes when my body was screaming NO.
What do I need in this moment?
It wasn’t easy to ask in the beginning.
Sometimes, the answers were surprising. Often, I was scared.
But ultimately, it was freeing. It was joyful.
And after a few months, for the first time in years, my head felt quiet when it hit the pillow. I could actually relax. I could rest.
And eventually, after 6 months - the face in the mirror started to look familiar. I saw myself. I saw my happiness. Even in sadness, I could be with it. Even in loss, I could find peace. Even through hurt, I could smile- because the gift of being unfiltered is knowing that you're never alone.
You start to love yourself. And when that happens, you start to make changes that people notice. And you invite them along with you: step up, or... lose me. Step up, or step aside...
"ENOUGH."
To look in the mirror and not recognize the person staring back. To have people ask, What do you like to do for fun? and come up blank.
Your world feels unrecognizable. You’re living someone else’s life because this can’t possibly be yours... can it?
In 2024, I fell apart. I was living like my life didn't matter. I keep telling myself that I didn't matter. That it was okay my hair was falling out, because I was still a good mom. That when my clothes stopped fitting, had holes I hadn't even noticed, that was fine because it didn't matter. And that, when I stopped remembering what I actually enjoyed doing- things just for me-, that was okay because my needs were so far down the priorities I was managing for other people, I actually forgot.
And I got sick. Physically something dormant triggered into action, emotionally weighed down by serving everyone else but myself I was constantly exhausted, and mentally I was surviving; mostly on energy drinks and my daughter's laughter.
But, after my mother-in-law died, it hit me hard. Looking at my daughter, I realized:
I can’t pour into her if I'm not here anymore. If my body breaks down, if my mind crumbles, if I disappear inside myself.
Melissa Paterson, Former people-pleaser
Learning to become unfiltered was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. It takes practice. It takes throwing yourself into uncomfortable positions. But it’s worth it & I’ll never go back.